Here’s a blueprint for a happier, wiser us: why don’t celebrities leave us alone? I’m not being harsh. My plan allows them to do whatever it is they do – act, sing, marry Tom Cruise – but in return it requires full disclosure when they embark on the inevitable second career, particularly if that career involves becoming “creative” or “artistic” director of a venerable fashion label.

　　这是一幅让我们更快乐、更睿智的蓝图：为什么名人不能不抢我们的饭碗呢？并不是我刻薄，我的意见是他们可以做任何他们想做的事——演戏、唱歌、嫁给汤姆·克鲁斯——但如果他们一定要从事第二职业，特别是如果这个职业是成为一个令人敬仰的时尚品牌的“创意”总监或“艺术”总监时，作为交换条件，他们所做的事一定要透明公开。

　　I accepted – didn’t we all?– their eagerness to slap their name on any old tat for what it was: eagerness to make (even more) money. But now that they’re invading territory that was formerly the preserve of people who survived on water and baked beans for years while they pinned frocks and learnt their craft, some transparency is called for. Christian Lacroix is currently underemployed since the house he nurtured for two decades no longer makes clothes. Meanwhile, Sarah Jessica Parker has three jobs – acting,producing and, latterly, “creative directing” for Halston.

　　我理解他们为了挣钱（挣比现在更多的钱）想要把自己的名字印在旧粗布上的急切心情，我们所有人不都很理解吗？不过既然他们侵犯了以前这一行当的人艰苦生活、缝制连衣裙、学习技艺多年才打下的这片天地，那么就应有一些透明度。自克里斯汀·拉克鲁瓦苦心经营了20 年的品牌不再制作衣服后，目前他就一直被大材小用。而与此同时，莎拉·杰西卡·帕克则身兼三职——演戏、制片，还有最近担任了品牌候司顿的“创意总监”

　　What does creative directing mean? Is it the same as Lindsay Lohan and her creative direction for Ungaro? Or does it entail sitting down with a pattern cutter and designing? Obviously, celeb attached to label equals celeb wearing label and getting photographed a lot. And I’m sure Parker works her socks off. She has a unique way with a prom dress. She’s also smart. She’ll probably outsell Lacroix 100 to 1. But, honestly, don’t you despair of Darwinism sometimes?

　　创意总监的含义是什么？和林赛·罗韩为恩加罗品牌做创意指导一样吗？或者是需要坐下来与裁剪师和设计师讨论吗？显然，明星和品牌联系在一起就意味着明星要穿这个品牌的衣服，拍很多宣传照。我确信帕克工作非常卖命。她能将舞会礼服穿出独特韵味，她也非常聪明，她的服装销售量可能是拉克鲁瓦服装销售量的 100 倍。但平心而论，有时候你不是也会对达尔文主义感到绝望吗？

　　Perhaps this is unfair. Maybe Parker will, as Victoria Beckham has, throw herself into her new fashion label. Listen to VB talk about her new collection each season, and it becomes clear she knows her stuff. Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have made a lovely job of the Row, their upmarket line of “basics”, too. But they don’t really have the distraction of acting careers any more. Will Parker have time to be so fastidious? Possibly not, so maybe they’ll have to get someone in behind the scenes to do that for her, just as they have at Ungaro.

　　也许这不公平。也许帕克会像维多利亚·贝克汉姆那样，全身心地投入到她的新时尚品牌中。听听维多利亚·贝克汉姆谈她每一季的新系列服装，你就会很清楚她了解她所制作的服装。玛丽-凯特·奥尔森和阿什莉·奥尔森为“basics”推出的高级服装系列“Row”做得也非常出色，不过她们其实已经不再需要为演艺事业分心了。帕克会有时间如此精益求精吗？也许不能，他们可能会找个人在幕后帮她做这些，跟恩加罗品牌的操作手法一样。

　To get a bit history teacher for a moment: Ungaro spent six years with Cristóbal Balenciaga. Azzedine Ala?a worked for Dior, admittedly only for five days, then scampered off to Guy Laroche. Alexander McQueen was apprenticed to Savile Row. Even Roberto Cavalli has form: he went to art school, invented a revolutionary technique for printing on leather, and won contracts with Hermès and Pierre Cardin. Like or loathe them, they all have something interesting or unique to add to the way women dress.

　　让我们花点时间来了解一些历史上的大师：恩加罗跟着克里斯托巴尔·巴伦西亚加学习了六年；全世界都知道阿瑟丁·阿拉亚只为迪奥工作了五天就被解雇，然后才去了姬龙雪；亚历山大·麦昆在萨维尔街做过学徒；就连罗伯特·卡沃利也有自己独特的历史：他上过艺术学校，发明了一种在毛皮上涂染的革命性技术，并获得了与爱马仕和皮尔·卡丹的合约。不管你是喜欢他们还是讨厌他们，他们都为女性的着装方式增添了某些有趣或特别的东西。

　　Judging from the current bout of red-carpeting, most celebrities have nothing to add. Actresses are ciphers – which seems fine because most women just want clothes they can wear, not clever statements or startling fabrications. But look at the bigger picture: eliminate innovation and provocation and eventually the fashion pool silts up.

　　而从目前的红毯着装来看，大多数明星穿的都没什么新意。女演员们都是“花瓶”——她们看上去漂亮是因为大多数女星穿的都是她们能穿的衣服，而不是因为她们穿的衣服构思精妙或做得鬼斧神工。但从长远来看：没有了创新和刺激眼球的设计，那么时尚界最终会鱼目混珠。

　　1. venerable a . (因高龄、德行)令人肃然起敬的，可尊敬的。

　　 2. tat n . 破烂(的东西)，粗布。

　　 3. work one’s socks off: 很努力，很卖命地工作。

　　 4. 达尔文主义（Darwinism）是与达尔文提出的进化论相关的一系列学说，作者在此提到达尔文主义意在表达其对“天择”和竞争的失望和无奈。

　　5. ciphern . 无足轻重的人，无价值的东西。