Sooner or later
A thief with a long record was brought before the judge.
Judge: Have you ever stolen things?
Thief: Oh, now and then.
Judge: And where have you stolen these things?
Thief: Oh, here and there.
Judge: Right. Lock him up, officer.
Thief: Hey, when do I get out jail?
Judge: Oh, sooner or later.
Chief is at the wedding
A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain."
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you in jail until the chief gets back."
"But ,officer, I …."
"I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"
A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm the groom." |
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