They’re Controlling 控制欲强

A sizable indicator that someone is a toxic person is if they are overly controlling. Though many of us have controlling tendencies, there’s a difference between someone who likes things tidy and someone who tries to manipulate the people close to them. If you feel somebody trying to pull your strings the person in question is probably not the best for you.

如果一个人的控制欲太强，他就是个有毒之人，这是一个很明显的征兆。虽然我们中的很多人都有控制倾向，但是喜欢井井有条和想控制别人还是有区别的。如果你觉得某个人想左右你的想法，那么这个人可能并不适合你。

They’re Jealous 嫉妒

Another way someone can be a toxic force in your life is by being constantly jealous of your accomplishments. The people you are closest to in life should be overjoyed each time you succeed, so if you feel like you can never share good news with this person that should be a red flag.

毒人的另一个特征就是一直嫉妒你的成就。你生活中最亲密的人在你每次成功的时候都该欣喜若狂，所以如果你觉得你从不和某个人分享好消息，那这就是个危险信号。

They Lie 撒谎

Unsurprisingly, toxic people are often frequent liars. Whether this person is telling large or little lies, it doesn’t matter. If you frequently catch someone lying to others, there’s a strong chance they are also lying to you. People who have the greatest positive effect on us are people we can trust, so keeping someone who is dishonest around will inevitably be a drain on you.

不出意外的话，毒人常常撒谎。这个人的谎言是大是小并不重要。如果你发现某个人常常对别人撒谎，很有可能他也对你没说实话。我们信任的人会对我们产生积极的影响，所以身边有不诚实的人必会拖累你。

They Play The Victim 装受害者

Another way toxic people can be harmful is by always playing the victim. Although these people may be convincing as to why a situation is far worse for them, if someone constantly claims to be the worst affected by life it can be a sign they are not good for you. Someone who is toxic will consistently ask others to give more than they themselves are willing to give.

毒人的另一种标志就是常常扮演受害者。虽然这些人经常表现出他们身处困境，好像真的一样。如果某个人不断说生活对他多么残酷，这可能就是他对你有害的一个标志。毒人常常要求别人的奉献得比他奉献给别人的多。

They Gossip八卦

Another hallmark of toxic people is a zest for gossip that’s a little too strong. Not only does overly frequent gossip show that someone will rarely converse with you about things of substance, gossip is also usually fiction. If you are constantly around someone who’s a constant gossip it is likely they have the same lack of respect for you. Not only that, only talking about other people is tiresome and boring in the long run, so you are probably better off without them.

毒人的另一大标志就是太过高涨的八卦热情。过于频繁的八卦不仅表现出这个人很少跟你讨论实际情况，就连八卦也是编造之词。如果你身边围绕的是一个八卦之徒，可能他对你也并不尊重。不仅如此，长时间讨论别人很是无趣，你最好远离这种人。

They’re Greedy贪婪

Another way toxic people negatively affect our lives is by being greedy. If someone close to you only has regard for what they gain in every situation, you are likely the one who will be constantly shortchanged. This might not bug you at first, but over time, getting the short end of the stick will take its toll.

毒人的贪婪也会对你的生活产生消极影响。如果你身边亲近之人只注重自己的利益，你可能就是每次被占便宜的那个人。一开始你可能并不在意，但是时间长了，不公平的待遇就会给你造成损失。

They Always Come First把自己排在第一位

In a similar way, toxic people usually only consider themselves. If the person in question never seems to find time for you (but you are constantly willing to help them), it’s a huge indicator that their time is more important to them. Another way someone only considers themselves is with a lack of concern for your well-being. If you frequently check in on them to see how they’re doing, but they show little to no regard for your state of wellness, it’s likely an unhealthy situation.

同样的，毒人常常只想到自己。如果一个人从不会为你空出时间（而你常常愿意帮助他们），这就是很明显的表示，他们的时间对他们更重要。一个人只考虑他们自己的另一个方式就是不关心你是否幸福。如果你常常联系他们，看他们过得怎么样，但是他们却很少关心你的状况，这可能是个危险的状况。

They’re Negative消极

Being overly negative and judgmental is another way toxic people give themselves away. No matter what you try and do with this person, it will always be less than what they wanted. Especially when unforeseeable problems arise, this person will complain to no end, let it completely ruin their day, and predictably blame you too. No matter how well an evening goes, it will always be too busy, too expensive, too much traffic, not enough fun, or not exciting enough. When you find someone’s negativity consistently interferes with your ability to have a good time, it’s likely time to move on.

另一个毒人的标志是过于消极和批判。不管你和这个人一起做什么，都不能使他们满意。特别是当不可预见的问题来临时，他会没完没了地抱怨，任其毁了他们的一天，然后可能还怪你。不管度过了多好的一晚，他都会说太忙了，太贵了，交通太堵了，不够好玩，或不够刺激。当你发现一个人太过消极，扫兴，你可能就要向前看了。

They’re Arrogant傲慢

Similarly, toxic people are often also very arrogant. They will see themselves as the smartest person in the room, and the only person capable of carrying out tasks. Perhaps their constant negativity stems from this arrogance, as it seems they always know the “right” way to do things. A person can only handle so much ego, so if you find yourself consistently put down next to this person, chances are they are an overall negative force for you.

毒人通常非常傲慢。他们认为自己是最聪明的人，只有自己能完成任务。可能他们的消极就来源于他们的傲慢，好像他们永远知道“对”的方法。一个人只能应对一定程度的傲慢，如果你发现自己常常屈居人下，可能他们对你有很大的消极影响。

They’re Always Right永远都对

Finally, toxic people frequently try to dominate every conversation. Since they think they are the smartest person in the room, everyone else must be wrong. With toxic people, small, humorous conversations will quickly escalate into violent arguments. You can also forget about them ever considering your point of view since their point of view is fact. When somebody sees a conversation as a challenge they must win it’s nearly impossible to have a healthy relationship. In this way, moving on from friends who are toxic is crucial in life to feel self-assured, free, and capable.

最后，毒人常常主宰谈话。因为他们觉得自己是最聪明的人，其他人都是错的。和毒人在一起，幽默的闲谈都会很快升级为激烈的争吵。他们从不会考虑你的观点，因为他们的观点才是事实。当一个人把一场谈话视为一场必须赢得的挑战时，正常的人际关系很难建立。因此，脱离毒友对于你找回自信、自由和才华很重要