Hello, my name is Dr O and I am the African parents specialist. Today, today, today, today, I bring you African Dad Lingo one zero one. So if you don't want to die in the hands of your African parents, please sit back, relax and learn. If you don't want to learn, rest in peace in advance. May the Lord be with you.

大家好，我是欧博士。我是非洲父母专家。今天，今天，今天，今天，我为你们带来了非洲爸爸术语101。如果你不想死在你非洲父母的手里，请往后坐，放松，跟我学习。如果你不想学，提早恭祝你安息。愿主与你同在。

Born and raised in Lagos, Nigeria. I moved to Miami from Nigeria in 2005. Growing up in Africa in an African household. You know the culture is very strong.

我出生和长大在尼日利亚的拉各斯。2005年，我从尼日利亚搬到美国迈阿密。我在一个非洲家庭长大。那里的文化是根深蒂固的。

Of course you are deaf now. I wish I gave birth to a 2lb yam instead.

当然，你现在装聋了，我宁愿自己生个两磅的山药也比生你好。

I came here and I realized how distinctively different the traditional culture was here. It made me appreciate the African culture more and you know that’s what I come up highlight in the videos.

我来到美国后发现这里的传统文化和非洲文化很不一样。这也让我更好的欣赏非洲文化的特色，你们也看到了，非洲文化是我在视频里突出强调的部分。

Dami.

达米。

Yes.

来了。

For instance, here in America, most people say more ‘hi mum, hi, dad'. But if you say ‘hi' to an African parent, hmm...Yeah, you already know how that goes.

例如，像在美国，大部分人大部分时候都会说“嗨，妈妈，嗨，爸爸”，但是如果你跟非洲的父母说“嗨”，嗯……看，你已经知道会发生什么事了。

Ok, dad, I’m confused. What am I supposed to say?

好吧，爸爸，我糊涂了。你觉得我应该怎么说？

How old to be confused? When devil has replaced your brain with your anus? When I call you, you say ‘yes, dad', not ‘daddy, yes'. You overgrown but underdeveloped and immature amoeba.

你多大了还糊涂？什么时候魔鬼把你的脑子换成肛门了？我叫你的时候，你应该说，“爸爸，是的”，而不是“是的，爸爸”。你这个身体长大了、心智残缺的、不成熟的阿米变形虫。

Social media is actually put me out there as a comedian. It’s what brought out the comedy in me.

事实上，社交媒体把我当做一名喜剧演员。它把我身体里的喜剧因子激发出来了。

Bimbo, I pity you. You should be the sorriest people in the whole world right now. You should be very, very, very, very, very sorry. Sorry that ordinary jollof rice, you can't cook; sorry that ordinary get good grads in school, you can't get.

蠢女人，我同情你。你现在应该是全世界最可怜的人了。你应该感到非常、非常、非常、非常、非常抱歉。抱歉你连最普通的拌饭（非洲一种由多种配料肉，洋葱，西红柿等做成的米饭）都不会做；抱歉你连普通孩子都能考出好成绩，你考不了。

A lot of my videos are not necessarily things I have experienced first hand. I just come up with them in my head, cause I figure someone, somewhere, is going through something like this.

我的很多视频不一定是我亲身经历的事情。只是他们跳到我的脑子里，我觉得某人在某处正在做这件事。

See how much time you are spending inside the toilet, Dami.

看看你花了多少时间在厕所，达米。

If you spend that much time on your books, you'll be more successful, you would do much better in school. If you spend this much time applying yourself starting your own company, starting your own establishment, you'll appear on Forbes richest, youngest African in America.

如果你把那些大把时间花在念书上，你会更有出息的，你的学习成绩会更好的。如果你把那些大把时间用在自己开公司、建立自己的事业上，你早都是《福布斯》上最有钱、最年轻的非裔美国人了。